This piece was written by Eva Barrie with support from Nikki Shaffeeullah and Signy Lynch.
Hi my name is Eva and I’m a Ding Dong.
Some may say a fool, a nincompoop, a human experiment gone wrong where all the brain bits turned into dryer lint.
In simplest terms…I’ve made a lot of mistakes. Today, I’ve decided to make a little float, and parade all those mistakes in front of you. Why? Because accountability is a learned skill, and the best way to learn is to fall flat on your face. I offer my bruises up because I see a lot of my peers and our arts leaders fumbling as well. As anti-violence advocate and founding member of Accountable Communities Consortium, Shannon Perez-Darby puts it “accountability is not a personality trait or identity. It’s a skill necessary for each of us to build and cultivate in order to have loving equitable relationships, communities and movements”.
Right now, I’m witnessing a crisis of accountability in our theatre community. Which makes sense: it’s not a sexy skill to have. It admits mistakes, failure, lack of knowledge, and scariest of all: being human. What’s worse, the structures in which we work haaaaate accountability. The non-profit system, with its deep roots in the plantation system (read up on it here ¹), relies on power imbalance, manufactured scarcity, and opportunism. Much of the time, any “accountability system” set up by a theatre is based on protecting the interests of the major stakeholders - the highest positions, and the wealthiest donors. But here’s the thing…it doesn’t need to be that way.
Before I talk about what could be, I’m going to talk about what is. There are other creative infrastructures and ways of working available to us, but first, we need to acknowledge the problem. A lack of accountability causes harm and impedes not only sectoral change but change on a broader, societal basis. I believe art-makers are disruptors of society, and meant to, as Toni Cade Bambara so beautifully put, “make the revolution irresistible”. In order to move towards this revolution, we need to be super honest with ourselves as we recognise that we’re missing a key skill. And to be mega clear: I’m not talking about treating each other “politely” or being “friendly”: I am talking about humane working conditions. We are working in an industry where those humane working conditions are often dismissed. I don’t want that…do you?
So let’s get to it!
What I am offering today is a collage of my clusterfucks, a smorgasbord of my schlemielism, an assortment of asshat-ery: I’m telling you about my mistakes. But more specifically, I will tell you how after I made a mistake - a very human thing, especially if you work/live in diverse communities with various needs and perspectives - my mishandling of that mistake escalated to harm because that’s the avoidable part. I will also bring in some examples from my own life where I was harmed by a lack of accountability, because - oh baby - our industry is ripe with them. In these examples, I’ll focus on where the person fumbling the accountability was in a position of relative power (the manager, project lead, AD, supervisor, instructor, mentor, etc), because that unequal relationship is packed with potential for Ding-Dongery.
With that, I say these thoughts are thoughts I’m currently working through, with my now-brain. To quote the preamble to presentations at afikra - a very wonderful organisation celebrating Arab culture, storytelling and curiosity - “I am not an expert, but I promise that I tried to learn as much as I could to satisfy my curiosity about this topic.” Because my now-brain is just mine, I’ll also offer some other materials that have helped me think critically about this topic: some podcasts, poetry, books, interviews, and people. I also took the time to ask some artistic leaders about their moments of Ding-Dongity, and their responses are in this companion piece.
So, let’s look at all the moments that make me drop my face in my palms out of embarrassment² and what those moments helped me learn.
1 The Plantation’s Fall and the Nonprofit Sector’s Rise: Addressing the Influence of the Antebellum Plantation on Today’s Nonprofit Sector by Shonda Nicole Gladden and Jamie Levine Daniel
2 FYI, I’ve been loosey goosey with pronouns and identifiers because it’s never about the individual. It is about the culture we work in that enables and justifies behaviour that hurts people. Secondly, at times my writing style may make it seem like I’m flippant about the harm I’ve caused. I’m not. I have a lot of gratitude for what these people taught me.
FACEPALM ONE: How dare you be so cruel and ask me to stand by my values?!
“Defensiveness creates unnecessary barriers. Sometimes people leave movements or communities, or stop attending events when they’re met with defensiveness, so please be receptive to feedback and give thanks for the gift that it is.”
Being asked to be accountable can be painful, as making mistakes can feel like a personal failure. A lot of folks express personal fears and challenges around being “called out” or “called in”. It can stir up a lot of emotions, and those feelings can be painful. But it’s important to distinguish between the pain of shame and the pain of harm caused by others.
In my Ding-Dongest of times, I was under the impression I was “above” certain mistakes. I had reached Gold Status in the Enlightenment category. I truly wish I could tell you this was when I was fresh out of the womb, but no. It was after years of justice work. Despite the organizing tenet that people are works-in-progress and ever-learning, I hadn’t fully internalised those fundamentals. So, when an artist approached me to share that my language and action around a certain topic was oppressing a group of people, my first thought was THAT’S IMPOSSIBLE! Which led to a series of arguments about how that was truly madly deeply IMPOSSIBLE, and included five-star “proof” akin to “but some of my best friends are from said community.” I was so busy caring about my feelings and the person I wanted to be (or be seen as), that all I could do was think about how HORRIBLE and MEAN the person who was asking me to maintain my publicly stated values was. Oh ding-dong Eva. Mayor of Ding-Dong Land.
I wonder if a big part of this is rooted in Canadian culture, where there’s a long-standing belief that shows itself in many circles, in many ways: we have Good People and Bad People. Good People don’t hurt others. Good People have “done the work”. Good People never make mistakes or cause harm because Good People would never flirt with being a ….Bad People.
But the thing is, you aren’t a bad person if you make a mistake. You’re worse than a bad person… you’re human. And that sucks, doesn’t it?
Our world has been shaped by a lot of pain: colonialism, white supremacy, white supremacy’s BFF capitalism³, and it’s near impossible to assume that these ideologies would not shape your behaviours, relationships, thought-processes, and therefore how you handle conflict. And, unfortunately, no one is above that because we all grew up in this dumpster-fire world. We all carry a lot of pain, and I’m a believer that we need to approach our work - and ourselves - in a trauma-informed way. Staci Haines, author of The Politics of Trauma writes: “While we have all inherited the social conditions in which we were born, while we have embodied them, and been shaped by them, we have many choices — and accountability — about what we do with them once we have more choice and agency as adults” (Haines 2019, 87).
“When we avoid conflict or move through it carelessly, we end up acting out and reinforcing micro versions of oppressive structural patterns unconsciously, even if we are from an identity harmed by those systems. This can end relationships, sidetrack organizations, and undermine social movements.”
I think one aspect that made (and continues to make) confronting my own actions so challenging is a culture of perfectionism. Back around the #MeToo time, I remember seeing a tweet from a pal that said something along the lines of “you know who doesn’t create abusive work environments? Women and people of colour”. If I remember correctly, this person was calling for more diverse leadership in the theatre community. Though the tweet was very well-intentioned, as someone who is both a woman and a brown one at that, it made me tighten up. The “perfect minority” myth robs the global majority and other historically marginalized groups of their humanity. I’d been brought up to believe that in order to be taken as seriously as my white male counterparts, I needed to be undeniably excellent at what I did. But that often leads to “excellence” being defined through a white lens. That white lens looooves perfectionism. It’s suuuuper into the unsustainable “star hero” leader⁴ concept; and lastly, it perpetuates white supremacy by robbing BIPOC leaders (especially Black women⁵) the ability to make mistakes and be met with compassion and the right to grow and learn.
If I could go back and speak to the Mayor of Ding Donglia (though I’m not sure she could have heard me from up on her high horse), I’d encourage looking at events as individual events shaped by society, and not markers of being a Bad Person. If we remove our own ego/reputation/resume from the equation, then we can address the moment, and put the focus where it really belongs: taking action so it doesn’t happen again, addressing unconscious bias, and finding remedy for the situation that needs repair.
If I may reference a mega-academic source for a moment: in Pixar’s Inside Out 2 when the lead girl is having an anxiety attack, the character of anxiety (yes, emotions are characters) takes over the control board in the little girl’s head (just watch the movie). Anxiety is so powerful, that it becomes this storm, and none of the other emotions or thoughts are able to get in there and balance the girl out. I really relate to that animated depiction of a human girl.
I feel like, in moments where someone comes to me and shows me I’ve swayed from my values, the little shame character in my head takes over, and tells me everything I’ve ever done is garbage, I’m garbage, and I should go and live in a trash bag. And instead of recognising that that was my own action that prompted that feeling, my shame character instead takes it out on the person messenger - they’re garbage! Everything they’ve done is garbage! I hope plastic bags flatter your silhouette - you garbage!
But lashing out at other people is kind of the opposite of accountability. So let’s hop into that shame bucket for a moment.
3 When I talk about these two ideologies/systems today, I’m not only referring to the overt white supremacy (ya know, the white hood kind), or overt capitalism (ya know, the billionaires behind the white hood kind), and I’m also not referring to them in our psychology. We live in a world that doesn’t just feature capitalism and white supremacy, it shapes the world, us, our ideals, values, and relationships.
4 The idea that a company’s integrity and identity is based on their leadership, rather than their work and mission (Kaust and Goodwin, 291). It leads to impossible succession planning, and also, it’s inherently flawed: individuals conform to their environment (Callander & Whitaker), which means unless there is deep structural change and a removal of dominant systems (ie: non-profit system), then there won’t be a lasting or meaningful change.
5 The State of Black Women Leadership Is In Danger by Cyndi Suarez
FACEPALM TWO: I disagree with you, NOW BURN IN HELL!
I was once supervising someone who I ended up not seeing eye to eye with, in a lot of ways. Where they saw comedy, I saw tragedy. Where they saw black, I saw white. Where they heard nails on a chalk-board, I heard Josh Groban’s 2007 Noël Album (I weep at the key change in Little Drummer Boy). So, when conflict arose, we had very very different viewpoints.
When this person came to me with their concern, my first impulse was to dismiss and brush them off. They were wrong! They were wrong about other things (the Josh Gorban thing?!).
“My sense is that if I spend more time talking to you than I spend complaining about you, then something wonderful often happens and the enlightenment is mutual ”
Other people viewed the situation the way I did! Plus, this person, according to previous employers, wasn’t really Mr. Congeniality, so that meant my views of them must be right (that’s what we call confirmation bias, but obviously I didn’t want to learn about confirmation bias - that wouldn't help me confirm I WAS RIGHT). I spent more time looking for reasons to NOT listen to this person, than I did investigating their actual concern.
When I took a break from my nonsense and took a step back, I remembered that as a person working for a not-for-profit company, it was literally my job to listen to and serve my community. Like actually. It’s breaking Canadian labour laws if I don’t. Leadership isn’t about writing grants or programming art; it’s a job of service, and, if we, as a community, begin to recognise that, it can lead to sectoral change. So I put my ego (my beautiful perfect ego!) aside, and when this person and I got to talking, and I got to listening (like actually listening. Not the kind of listening where you wait to say your point and win your argument⁶), I saw where they were coming from. I understood their anxiety and hurt much more.
“So, you know, when you have a conversation, you never know what’s going to come out of your mouth or out of somebody else’s mouth.
”
Organizations need disruptors, and they need to welcome disrupters wholeheartedly. Institutional conformity leads to staff members not seeing problems where they are, even if they are blaring from an outside perspective⁷. The issue is, because our workplaces and understanding of leadership is based in patriarchal values, “institutional dissent” is seen as a negative quality, when, in fact, it’s vital to progress⁸. Even (and often) the most progressive orgs⁹ can fall trap to this, and need to do the work to ensure their values are in line with handling conflict in moments of stress.
Ultimately, this person’s coming to me was an act of generosity. They cared about the work and wanted to enhance my leadership. We shared the goal of treating artists well, and thankfully (once I actually listened), I understood that. It took me an embarrassingly long time, but I recognised that you do not need to agree with someone to be compassionate.
6 Great read: ”Dismantling Privilege with Mindful Listening” in Beth Berila’s Integrating Mindfulness into Anti-Oppression Pedagogy: Social Justice in Higher Education
7 McMullen: “What Makes an Entrepreneurship Study Entrepreneurial? Toward a Unified Theory of Entrepreneurial Agency”. If you’re interested in institutional conformity, I have a lot of sources that are a touch less dense than this one (see works consulted)
8 Engaged Dissent: Entrepreneurship and Critique in the Institutional Practice of Three Contemporary Artists by Adrienne Callander
9 Staci K. Haines: The Politics of Trauma
FACEPALM THREE: Do I look like Curious George? Keep your Nancy Drew questions to yourself!
“Before we make any judgements, we must ask questions. This is the deepest meaning of the idea, often repeated but little understood, that the study of art shows us how to live ”
I once had a manager who didn’t ask questions. If I offered something she didn’t understand, she would never dig, but move on, as if it was not an important element of the conversation if she didn’t know it. When someone in the company expressed concern, her go-to was “that’s not a problem here”.
Looking back, I think it was because of insecurity not narcissism, but that didn’t change the fact that conflicts continued to escalate because there was a deep lack of curiosity in the other person’s perspective and knowledge. Jordan Klepper, best known for being an undercover leftist interviewing people at Trump rallies, hosted a TED talk about how to disagree with people (and thus, save democracy), and offers that the phrase “‘I don’t know’ invites softness”.
In their Turning Towards Each Other Workbook, Jovida Ross & Weyam Ghadbian invite us to treat every complaint as though a percentage of it is true, and it’s our job to find out how high that percentage is. I also like to look at this with a dramaturg’s eye: in a play, nothing ever happens “by chance”. A poor dramaturg is quick to dismiss an element of the story if it doesn’t fit their understanding of the play so far. Similarly, poor accountability happens when we assume a concern is impossible/untrue/outrageous/in bad faith. So, instead of dismissing any complaint, turn up your curiosity and figure out how much truth there is to it.
“Shut up and listen. Shut up and listen. Shut up and listen…and once you’ve heard, ask poignant questions about what you don’t understand.”
If someone comes to you and surprises you with a concern or hurt, even if you can’t imagine any truth in their offer (which…come on, let’s be real, that’s pretty douchey), make the assumption that it is at least 25% true and find out where that 25% is hiding.
Especially if you are working interculturally, there is absolutely no way of knowing everything about someone’s experience - that’s beautifully impossible, and why art can be so profound! I was working on a show about the experiences of folks in the South Asian diaspora (which is a huge and diverse group of people, much to the confusion of many North Americans). Things began to get crunchy in both a creation and producing way when some peoples’ views and needs were met with more care than others, in ways that replicated the systems of supremacy in the region. I asked to have a conversation about it, but management said they didn’t see the problem, because for them, it seemed like a fuss about “slightly different brown skin tones”. I didn’t expect this person to know the ins and outs of colonialism, the violence of partition, forced displacement, the caste system, India’s current right wing government, Hindutva, colourism in India and its ripples in the diaspora and and and….but, looking back, a more responsible - and certainly more brave - response may have been “I don’t know enough about that, can you tell me more?”.
Curiosity often leads to beautiful art. As arts leaders, why not embrace that in our organization as well?
FACEPALM FOUR: I WILL ONLY LISTEN WHEN YOU’RE ABSOLUTELY PERFECT
I spent a lot of my youth learning to get people to listen to me. I would avoid loaded words like “racism” when actions were clearly racist, and instead try to find cute lil substitutes instead. I’ve attended a lot of conferences and workshops on “speaking up” and “not being a bystander”. To this day, I still send any email that might be received in a negative way to at least a few colleagues and mentors, and I’ve looked over many emails from friends doing the same. I have followed the proper workplace safe-space reporting channels to a tee, and followed all the company’s stated rules.
And you know what? If the interest in building accountability skills isn’t there, I don’t think any of that matters. No matter how the person harmed addresses you, if you don’t want to listen, you’ll find a way to shut them down.
The go-to tactic to get out of accountability is to blame the victim. Whether it’s nitpicking their words, finding something they didn’t do perfectly, or feeling the way they responded to the harm and violence you are responsible for wasn’t chill/kind/professional/polite enough, whatever your tactic is, it distracts from the real problem: the behaviour and action you and your organization have committed. Civility politics will always derail the bigger picture and gaslighting will always be easier than taking responsibility.
There’s a trend at the moment to claim a victim is overstating harm. I’m really not into that. Firstly, it dismisses that percentage that may be true that we explored in Facepalm II. Secondly, and for me, more importantly, what if we dropped the bar for compassion? If someone comes to you and says “you sprained my wrist” and your response is “psssht, come back when the whole arm is broken”, what does that say about you, and us, as a whole? In an art form where we strive for vulnerability, and the words “empathy” and “compassion” appear smattered across websites and grant applications, do we actually celebrate those traits, or are they just marketing tools?
FACE PALM FIVE: BUT NELLY FURTADO’S SONG ‘POWERLESS’¹⁰ WAS WRITTEN ALL ABOUT ME!
Leading is sometimes a very thankless job. People don’t see all the battles you fight daily. You are working in systems that aren’t conducive to artistic success and risk, and it can feel like you are constantly hitting against a wall.
There are a lot of intersections of identities that can affect power dynamics in relationships (race, class, gender, ability, etc), but one place where a leader certainly has power is over the person they hired. Because…they hired them.
If I may get nerdy with you (who am I kidding, you’re reading a Generator blog. You’re all a bunch of nerds), the way Marx defines capitalism is the inherently exploitative relationship between employer and employee. As a worker, you do not need to feel exploited to be exploited, you systemically are¹¹. The employer has more power than you, and makes decisions that affect you, for you.
And when we think of the freelance/gig work system, if you can choose whether or not to work with someone, you have power over them. If you sit on juries, conduct auditions/castings, and have the ability to make someone who expressed concern to you feel small and unwelcome when you run into them in an industry setting…hullo power.
In their essay The Death of White Supremacy Culture in the US Creative Sector and Implications for Arts Management, authors Floyd and Cuyler discuss how an understanding of critical race theory can help people in arts management positions better create healthy working environments. One thing that struck me was their articulation of how people who have formal or informal power insist on a “right to comfort” which means protection from “open conflict”¹². This right to comfort allows those in power to maintain power. Over the years, I’ve heard an increase of “self-care speak” being co-opted by those in power, but never granted to those with less power¹³. This connects to Floyd and Cuyler’s thoughts on the colonial-capitalist worship of individualism, or what they call the “I’m the only one” mentality: the person in power is the only one with the knowledge, expertise, and experience to lead the team, and denies the essential principle that human beings are interdependent¹⁴ (connected to the star-hero complex of Facepalm One). White supremacy culture then turns this against the person with less power in a new, perverse way: if someone with less power acts in a way that protects their individual dignity (ie: whistleblowing or simply voicing concerns), they are seen as not “a team player”¹⁵. Think about the summer of 2023, when Marit Stiles removed Sarah Jama from the NDP caucus after she advocated for Palestinian human rights. In an email to NDP supporters, Stiles said it had nothing to do with Jama’s advocacy, but about “principles of trust and working together as a team”¹⁶. Now, that’s white-speak for “I felt uncozy when you reminded me of your humanity” if I ever heard it.
So, when someone with less power comes to you with a conflict, work to even the field, or better, empower them. People can’t listen or communicate when their nervous system is in threat mode (the flight/fight/appease/dissociate mode)¹⁷. So, ask them how they want to have a conversation and respect their rules. Sometimes texts/emails feel safer, but we lose important information, and there isn’t an opportunity to actually have a dialogue (especially non-verbal dialogue). When I’ve asked someone to meet with me in sensitive situations, I will encourage that person to bring a pal, and meet them in a place that will make them feel safe to express themselves. Some people feel uncomfortable about this because of “confidentiality”; however, when working under Canada’s Charity Act, I argue that transparency and accountability are far more important than protecting the confidentiality of those in power (I also think NDA’s in the non-profit sector should be banned, but who am I?). After the meeting, it’s also helpful to say you’ll be checking in in a week or so, and then do so. Why? Let people decompress. Take away the pressure that this was the only chance to talk. Nurture a relationship. Care about your community on a deeper level, not just on a mandated HR level.
Accountability is hard. It requires us to be very honest with ourselves. What are YOUR intentions going in? Are you just there to tick off a box, avoid a lawsuit, or (upsettingly often) punish the person for their criticism and foster a fear of reprisal in your organization? Are you acknowledging the power imbalance and your responsibilities as a manager/leader/facilitator/instructor/elder? In leadership, that kind of radical reflection and honesty is not a trait that is celebrated, as it threatens profits and power. But maybe it’s time we re-prioritized what we believe is effective leadership. What if we welcomed tenderness, compassion, and reflection?
10 This song is a banger and it should be played more often, more loud.
11 Richard Wolff: Understanding Capitalism, pg 148
12 The Death of white Supremacy Culture in the US Creative Sector and Implications for Arts Management: A Critical Race Theory View” by Quanice Floyd and Antonio C. Cuyler
13 In my life, I have asked for a mental health leave three times (I would have benefitted from more, but I was trained in the era where if you weren’t deeply mentally distraught, you weren’t working hard enough). The only time it was ever afforded to me was when I, myself, was in a leadership position. Every other time, I have been told to “buck up” followed by a meaningless “but if you need to chat, girl I’m totally here for you”, or been removed from the project.
14 This is also discussed in Sins Invalid “Skin, Tooth, Bone”...and a really fantastic primer about disability justice.
15 Floyd & Cuyler - great read!
16 Email “A Message to Davenport”, Oct 25th, 2023
17 Staci K. Haines: The Politics of Trauma
FACEPALM SIX : Loyalty Part I: I took your cat to the vet, you must bow down to me forever!
Just because you got someone a job, programmed their show, bought them a house, or attended their goldfish’s graduation,that does NOT mean that you can dismiss their concerns.
The paternalistic behaviour of “I made you” needs to go, but it can rear its ugly head in big and little ways. If an artist you supported comes to you and expresses a fear or hurt, do not diminish their experience, talent and hard work. They do not owe you loyalty in the face of harm. And when there is a difference in power, there is no such thing as two-way loyalty. They can lose way more than you.
“‘Sir, please don’t say that’ Why? They said ‘We think it’s very inappropriate to say so’ Why? I’m president. I want to protect the women of this country. They said ‘sir, I just think it’s inappropriate for you to say’. I pay these guys a lot of money, can you believe it?”
Economist Richard Wolff talks a lot about the psychological toll capitalism has on us¹⁸. It engrains itself in relationships, making people believe that all relationships are transactional. It stops being about humane, compassionate, joyful interaction, and more about opportunism and aligning with the people who can bring a person the most economic/professional gain.
It’s hard to stand up to power, and I’ve talked to a lot of people who feel they just can’t do it, or support someone who is doing it. And if someone commissioned your work, championed you along the way, or frequently hires you ensuring steady income…I get it. But I wonder what could happen if we rewired our brains to believe that holding someone accountable is not attacking them. What if we, as leaders, celebrated people who help us serve the community?
18 Richard Wolff: Understanding Capitalism, pg 159
Loyalty Part II: Ronaldo took my cat to the vet! Bow down to Ronaldo forever!
“Even after all this time
The sun never says to the earth,
“You owe Me.”
Look what happens
with a love like that
It lights the Whole Sky”
Let’s say someone approaches you and says, “hey, Ronaldo over there punched me” and your answer is “what?! Ronaldo is a hoot at all my parties so slap some frozen peas on that black eye and get back to work”...are you acknowledging that Ronaldo is a human? Is it compassionate to view Ronaldo as a one dimensional perfect robot? Or is it in Ronaldo's best interest for you to support them in their journey of accountability, while simultaneously acknowledging the hurt person seeking help from you?
I was once in a conflict with a colleague over an initiative we were launching. I wanted to GET IT DONE and they needed more time to work it through. I called up my mentor, asking how I should deal with this VERY difficult person who is VERY wrong about everything. I expected my mentor to tell me I was so right, so pretty, and so cool. Now, she has been mentoring me for many years, and there’s a reason for that. When I finished telling the story, she thought for a moment and asked “well, sure, okay, you sound very passionate about this but…do you think you might be steamrolling your colleague? And isn’t that the bigger issue here?”.
We need people who will pull us down to earth and encourage us to contemplate our actions with humility, like my mentor did. Surround yourself with those people. Work with those people. And hopefully…become those people.
Loyalty Part III: But it wasn’t me! I’m just hanging out here with Ronaldo!
I think, at times, we are more loyal to our proximity to power than we are to our values. If harm occurs during a working process, it is not an interpersonal spat - it is a workplace issue. Just because you aren’t directly involved, doesn’t mean this issue does not deserve your attention. By turning away you are complicit in the harm, which will - without attention - inevitably grow into an engrained workplace culture.
Moreover, if we don’t address harm in the workplace, or if we pin it all to one “problem individual” we aren’t looking at the whole structure that allows that behaviour to continue¹⁹. I relistened to a chat between Jill Keiley and Weyni Mengesha the other day, where Jill asked Weyni how she felt about needing to make amends for the actions of Soulpepper’s previous administration. Weyni’s very thoughtful response includes how she is now benefiting from an institution that enacted harm, and that she is “interested in doing the work, and the only way you can do that work is to acknowledge what’s happened” and goes on to add “I take just as much responsibility because we need to. We all need to be active”. I’ve known a lot of leaders with less mature and reflective responses, but I’m very grateful for the grace Weyni has to recognise and address the responsibility that comes with being a community leader.
When it comes to addressing organisational harm, you can put your head in the sand all you want, but eventually your silence is hurting everyone (including you). Yes, it sucks and it’s hard and dangerous to stand up for others, but I also urge you to reflect on accountability to yourself. Are you staying true to the person you want to be? What’s getting in the way? Who can you reach out to for support on re-aligning your moral compass?
19 Reverend angel Kyodo williams chats about this in this ctznwell podcast very thoughtfully.
An Important Sidebar: Understand Gaslighting.
Gaslighting has been a term that has been in heavy rotation the last few years. Some may see the term and believe it’s over-used, but I think it’s indicative of how pervasive the problem is.
A lot of the above examples move towards gaslighting, and it’s important to understand the specifics, especially of “workplace gaslighting”, or “whistleblower gaslighting”. Gaslighting is psychological manipulation, and it is against Canada’s Occupational Health and Safety Act and employment laws. Despite it being against the law, it is extremely prevalent in the Canadian theatre industry. In order to foster an environment of accountability in your organization, make sure that you are well aware of the signs of gaslighting, and watch for signs of this within yourself and others.
Workplace gaslighting can look like: “trivialization by a supervisor [by] changing topics to place blame on [the victim], minimizing concerns, making promises that don’t match their actions, twisting or misrepresenting things [the victim] said and making degrading comments about you and pretending [the victim has] nothing to be offended about” (Forbes). Gaslighters can also abuse power by claiming they are the victim in order to emotionally blackmail their subordinate (think about the “right to comfort” premise), disregard or ignore facts you put in front of them, or convince someone that they are alone, and no one sides with them.
I once was harmed by the supervisors of a project, and after some time, we entered the mediation phase. The process was sold to me under a transformative justice lens, and meant to be respectful, caring, and with the goal to listen to each other. When I got there, it felt like a thesis project on why I was unworthy of compassion. I was spoken over, lied to repeatedly, scoffed at, had my racialized experience belittled, my character questioned, my intelligence minimized, made to believe my supervisor was victimized, and told I had imagined behaviours I had experienced despite the fact there was clear proof. I reached a point where I actually couldn’t speak or articulate my thoughts anymore (and look at the word count on this article, if anything I’m verbose). Looking back (and with help from therapy), I understand now I entered the trauma response of “appease” in attempts to stop the ever-expanding harm²⁰. The way this manifested was that I withdrew my original complaints of sexism and racism. This sucked, for a lot of reasons. Firstly, it lets the company believe that if they use cruelty, they can silence and control community advocates, and continue inside the abusive systems that give them power. Secondly, I was so excited when I woke up that morning. I am hopeful to the point of naivety, and I really thought repair and rebuilding the relationship would start. But it wasn’t the time.
For me, it took me a while to figure out what was happening. It affected every single relationship I had, or was to have, for a long time, and affected the way I approached my work and studies. I closed off. I stayed away from theatre work, out of fear of it happening again. Physically, I became unhealthier. My self-worth took such a blow, I was convinced that not only was I not strong enough for theatre work, I was not strong enough for life. It was especially tough because it was from people I trusted and cared about. But these are the effects of gaslighting; it truly shatters individuals.
Capitalism trains us to accept the suffering of others. It’s part of the game²¹. We do “the best for the project”, or make sacrifices for the “art”. But we actually need people to make art. We need collaborators. No art can be made in a vacuum, and no artistry needs to rely on abuse.
*A note to those who have been gaslit:
I’m really sorry. I wish I had a fix for you, but I’m not there either. Do seek professional help (that was very helpful to me), and find someone to work through the trauma not only mentally, but physically as well (our bodies store trauma). One offer that was made to me was to stop trying to receive solace from the abuser(s). They are on their accountability journey and it’s best not to wait for them. Surround yourself with people who want the world to be more courageous and humane. Be inspired by them, and know there are so many of them.
20 Staci K. Haines: Politics of Trauma
21 Richard Wolff: Understanding Capitalism, pg 160
FACEPALM SEVEN: Sit…. …sit…..Stay. Good Leader - Hey! Get back here!
Shame often leads to a desire for self-preservation. We want to stop this feeling as quickly as possible, and save ourselves. So the answer? React as quickly as possible. Don’t waste time considering other possibilities or gathering information, but press the “EJECT” button as quickly as possible. I’ve seen this destroy teams, art, and people.
“I’m so used to being very responsive, take-action-now kind of person. And always told myself this was a good thing, and that I confront issues as they happen, but a bit of age and wisdom have shown me just how counterproductive it can be when it comes to interpersonal and inter/intra community conflict. So many times adding more fire to the fire, only makes it burn longer.”
A culture of false urgency is alive and well in many organisations. The Montreal-based Centre for Community Organizations created the White Supremacy in Organizations resource, which articulates how false urgency is a key element of what the authors define as ‘white supremacy culture,’ and lists ways cultures of urgency undermine anti-racist values. Notably, it takes away inclusive, thoughtful conversations, and doesn’t allow us to consider long term consequences of our actions. We attempt “quick fixes” without actually looking at the root of the issue.
Furthermore, a culture of false urgency lessens our ability to handle real urgency - mental health emergencies, death/illness/injury, as well addressing harm. Often our workplaces put capitalist pursuits (the production) above all other labour, responsibilities, and life circumstances. They remove us from life…and how are we supposed to make plays about living if we consistently diminish its importance?
So, next time someone expresses you caused them harm, it’s good to take the time to breathe and process - but be sure to communicate that; don’t leave them hanging. And don’t add false-urgency-things like “I’ve got a show to open” or “this grant deadline is coming up” or “I am making a pinata and I really need it to look like a life-like version of Jeff Goldblum”. Shows can “go on” in multiple ways, grants are there to support - not supersede - people, and maybe the pinata thing is actually urgent so you keep glueing on those paper strips, girl.
And speaking of opening shows, grants, pinatas, and other juggling…
FACEPALM EIGHT: OUR STATUS QUO IS “LOL everything sucks anyway”
“It is what it is” is the most unimaginative sentence, and it’s infuriating coming from creatives.
Theatre in Canada is very conservative, and why? It was designed that way. The non-profit industrial complex and charity as we understand it was created by puritans (Calvinists), who were mega horny for capitalism, but still thought selfishness would send them to hell, so they invented charity to feel chill about their capitalism²². Because of this, a lot of non-profits function under capitalist norms, and rely on the existence of capitalism to thrive.
“We need each other. We need each other’s differences. We need the many different things that each of us has to offer. This is about relentless humility: we do not know how to make the changes that we need to make, and we will only discover the paths together.”
But guess what? We can do better! I promise! There are alternative models (worker coops, fiscal sponsorship, participatory budgeting/democracy practises) that root themselves in anti-capitalism, and therefore are anti-racist (because here’s a tough nugget of truth: if your anti-racism isn’t also anti-capitalist, it’s not anti-racism, it’s an instagram post). Inviting new ideas from outsiders allows for “ontological facileness”²³; which is nerd-speak for the ability to imagine a different way of existing. This is crucial in building up capacities for accountability. The less open we are to new ideas, the less likely we will be to take responsibility for harming someone, because we can’t possibly imagine a world where that harm didn’t need to occur.
Recognise that your status quo may be cozy - or at least unsurprising - but an outsider may see how you can pursue your mission with more care and success. Remember: caterpillars turn into literal goop before they become butterflies. It’s not comfy. It’s gross and weird. But embrace the goop.
22 “The way we think about charity is dead wrong”, TED Talk by Dan Pallota
23 “What Makes an Entrepreneurship Study Entrepreneurial? Toward A Unified Theory of Entrepreneurial Agency” by McMullen, Brownell, & Adams.
FACEPALM NINE: Set our organization up for conflict? Naaaah…. We have excel sheets to colour code.
I was once producing a project that was a doozy. Artistically it was challenging (in a fun way), and logistically it was a nightmare (in a nightmare way). Once opening came, my co-producer and I were EXHAUSTED. We decided I could take a weekend off, and upon my return he would take time off. While I was gone, DRAMA unfolded (and not fun drama, nightmare drama). When I returned and the drama was doing a drama-dance in front of me, my response was “how could you let this happen?!” rather than the much better response of “how can I support you” or, even better, “how can we set ourselves up better to avoid these situations, and also respond thoughtfully when they do happen?”. We were both too exhausted to effectively deal with a conflict, so it escalated and caused harm.
That incident led us to revisit our values, our protocols, and the company organisation. Our organisation was unhealthy, which led to us making unhealthy decisions. It required consultation and a freeze in day-to-day operations, but that was OKAY because ultimately, it made the work more sustainable, and allowed us to begin the journey addressing conflict with compassion and clarity.
One piece of advice from a mentor was to normalise conflict, so we dedicated time in every staff meeting to discuss resolved and unresolved issues. Initially, it felt self-congratulatory (“so-and-so were in a conflict, but look how perfectly we handled it!”), but with time, I noticed that team members were less conflict averse, and even felt empowered to bring seemingly resolved but still crunchy moments to these meetings. It also was an opportunity for us to practise receiving feedback (ugh so hard) and learn the skills to listen, process, and work through moments of challenge. In these sessions, and then as a company, we were practising the ongoing and ever-evolving journey of accountability (guess what: no one is ever done learning to build this skill). What it taught us was that accountability is not only about reacting in the moment, but how you can prepare, plan, and work together daily.
Rather than assuming conflict won’t ever come up - bet that it will, and that’s not a bad thing! Invest in training and time to build that skill.
FACEPALM 4 MILLION²⁴: BUT MY BUDGET IS A GET OUT OF JAIL FREE CARD
It’s so easy! You just shrug and say “oh man, if only we had more money! Shucks!” and the conversation is done and everyone hugs. If only…
Budgets are much more than numbers. They are made by people, and they reflect our values. They tell our stories, create hierarchies, reflect long term goals, and spotlight our biases or inherited historical inequities²⁵
Many years ago, I had a pal that was on tour in Europe, and as her and the creative team jumped from country to country, she found out that the actor she was working alongside had a per diem. It had been negotiated into his contract, because he’d worked with the company before, and it was standard based on his home province. It was just the two of them in the show. She then approached management and asked for a per diem as well. The company said it was too late, and they didn’t have the budget for it. She then shared that this made her uncomfortable because it meant that a brown woman and a white guy were doing the same job, but he was being better compensated for it. The conversation ended, but a few days later she was called back to a meeting. She had high hopes that they reallocated money towards a per diem for her. That wasn’t the case. In the meeting, she was asked to apologise to the management because she had “made it about race” and therefore accused them of being racist (just quick reminder of facepalm one: accountability is not an attack!).
This isn’t the only story I’ve heard like this. A lot of folks put a lot of weight on intention, which I understand. But if we only care about the intention of an action, we’re ignoring the harm the action caused. With budgets, maybe you didn’t intend to tell a certain story with your budget, but the story was told, nonetheless.And rather than telling someone they are wrong about the numbers they can see on the page, take responsibility for the very real consequences of your decisions.
One of the people who really engrained this in me was Marjorie Chan. I met with Marjorie when she was still the AD at Cahoots and supported their initiative to create the Deaf Artists and Theatre’s Toolkit (DATT). I expressed that I was concerned that the company I was working for couldn’t afford a Deaf Community Consultant. She said to adjust my language and say “the company I am working for is not investing in inviting the Deaf community into our work.” Marjorie really nailed it: that was not a story I wanted to tell, but it doesn’t change that that was the simple fact of the matter.
When I changed that language, no, the numbers in the budget didn’t suddenly quadruple, but I found ways to be more resourceful, advocate for what the company needed, and make long term goals. We did end up hiring a Deaf Community Consultant, and not only did we find ways to make a fee that worked for both of us, we created a longer relationship that led to more impactful and better resourced initiatives. Looking back, the impact of the relationship with the Deaf Community Consultant (Elizabeth Morris - super cool. Hire her!) on the company (and me) was so valuable, to think that I had originally shrugged it off as a line item in one fiscal year is so banana-pants.
Capitalism teaches us to treat humans with the same preciousness as stuff. Equating people to things is exactly what got us all into this crumbling world. Reframe the story. Embed humanity into your budgets.
24 Ugh, long essay huh?
25 For instance: work that has been performed by queer people and women - ie costume design/building - has been traditionally paid less than other departments. This is slowly shifting, however, these departments are often the last to unionise, leading to less support, more hours, and unethical output expectations.
FACEPALM THE LAST: SORRY NOT SORRY
My last facepalm is one I’ve learned because of my many missteps in accountability: learning to apologise and actually mean it.
“We are all waking up. It is going to get messy. The good news is there are brooms and there are rags
”
I once really screwed up with a close friend of mine. I had no idea I was doing anything wrong (in fact, I thought I was hELpInG). When I learned I caused them pain, I wanted to make it right, so I pulled out Rania El Mugammar’s²⁶ (an amazing poet and anti-oppression facilitator) Anatomy of an Apology, which offers a guideline for apologising. After I did that, my friend and I could develop plans where I actually was hELpINg, and we were closer than ever. Now, in case you hear the clip clop of my high horse in your ears, remember…getting to that point took probably 36 years (34 if I use my anti-aging cream). I don’t know if I ever made a real, earnest, selfless, apology before then. But now, it’s in my blood and hopefully I can do it again, when I’m horrible the next time.
What I love about Rania’s guide is that it forces our ego aside. During our apologies, there may be the desire to give our Resume of Good Deeds, explain away the harm we caused, or not take accountability (ie: apologising for someone’s feelings, rather than your own actions). But Rania presents a roadmap for apologies that should be a tattoo on everyone’s arm.
26 I’ve taken a few workshops with Rania, and she’s incredible. If you are looking for a facilitator to support the evolution of your organization (or if you’re an individual looking for affordable and brilliant workshops), visit her website.
PALMS OUT…LAST OFFERS
If we learned to communicate better and celebrate tenderness despite the hardships and challenges that exist within a recovering industry, we might be able to find better solutions to problems hurting our world. If we can practise accountability with our friends, our colleagues, our organisations, maybe then we will be better equipped to practise it on a larger scale. If we let ourselves be full, messy, ding-dongs and then figure out ways to be in conflict compassionately, what would that do to us?
For me, the crisis of accountability is not limited to the theatre sector, but it defines how we exist in the world. If we spend so much of our lives in workspaces that do not practise accountability - 40 hours per week (or 48 in theatre, for some archaic reason), how can we ever build those skills? How can we ever value accountability, if we never experience the care, compassion, and generosity it generates?
I was at a protest for an Arms Embargo at the end of last October. It was at a Kamala Harris rally, and a young man came over and asked what we were up to (he saw a group of people in keffiyehs and got curious). I told him we were trying to pressure the Biden-Harris administration to stick to their word and uphold international law. He kept asking me who I would vote for, but I kept deflecting, as Biden could, that very moment, withhold weapons and stop the killing, which would actually support his cause (a vast majority of not only democrats, but Americans were in support of a halt to supplying weaons). We both agreed that would be the most humane and true to the Democratic party’s values. We talked about the historic precedent for Biden implementing an arms embargo immediately, but then this fellow and I chatted about his recent 30th birthday, his town in Virginia, how it resembled my hometown in Alberta, a specific episode of Parks & Recreation, and parted. Shortly after, I noticed him go to another group of protesters, whom I know to be Palestinian-Americans. I couldn’t hear what they were saying, but noticed their exchange turned tense, and he left. The Kamala rally started, we started protesting, and then, this young man started egging on other rally goers to shout over us, intimidate, and physically attack us. We were maybe 20-30 people at that point. This was a huge rally (estimated 75 000 people). I saw what he was doing, and went over. I didn’t have a chance to say much but he saw on my face how betrayed I felt by him. He yelled “but they called me racist!”, got a sheepish look, and then disappeared into the crowds. A group of Kamala supporters began violently attacking the protesters. I positioned myself between them and some small kids and other vulnerable protesters. Soon after, a group of anti-zionist rabbis I grew acquainted with through other protests formed a barrier between the Kamala supporters and the protesters. Eventually the police arrived, and arrested someone (I can’t remember which “side” that person was on, I vaguely remember them being a Kamala supporter, but I don’t know if my memory is clear in the violence of it all). I do remember the only people who warned the police that they were filming and watching for police brutality were the Arms Embargo protesters.
“What are the small and significant places where you can be practising accountability not as a way to respond to crisis, but a as way to build intimacy, to change and grow in your everyday life? ”
We don’t know how to be accountable to ourselves, each other, our governments, and our values. Maybe it’s the incessant survival mode. We’re so busy trying to come up for air, we don’t bother to question if the air we’re breathing is safe. We’ve become accustomed to an individualized framework where we make enemies and push each other away. In order to justify that, we become the thing we thought we were fighting against.
Theatre is a really special place. In ancient Greece, it was mandatory for citizens to attend - it was part of their civic engagement. It was a place, and continues to be a place, where we can create the worlds we want to live in. But before you create a world, you need to be curious. We can’t make new worlds if all we do is uphold this broken one. So get your hands dirty. Practise radical empathy. Listen. Apologise when necessary, and learn learn learn.
I wonder, if we had the courage to do that, what it would do to our art. If we let it be as nuanced as ourselves, with the bravery it takes to sit with shame and mistakes. What if we took lessons from community organizers, and people working outside of our oppressive systems to really lean into the conversations of the world? What if our characters weren’t perfect, but messy and struggling with the big problems we’re struggling with? What if we collaborated deeply, and chose compassion over ego, and humanity over institutions? What if the art lets us think forward, by actually listening to the present? Wouldn’t that be beautiful?
And I bet it would be fun too.
(end)
Works Cited and Consulted
Note from Eva: I’m currently pursuing an self-created masters that investigates reimagined creative infrastructures and dramaturgy. I’ve been pretty immersed in this stuff over the last year, and am happy to share what I’ve learned. I’m a big believer in the African proverb “if you want to go fast, go alone; if you want to go far, go together” and the closely connected philosophy of Ubuntu (loosely translated: I am because we are). I’ve added some works I’ve directly cited, as well as other ones that have influenced/inspired my thinking. If this list feels overwhelming to you and you’re not sure where to start, reach out to me! I’m happy to recommend some sources based on what you’re grappling with.
Also, since alternative creative infrastructures is my thesis, I’ve written a tonne of papers, so I may be able to send you some that help (I’ve been told my writing is “decidedly un-academic”, so I promise they aren’t too boring).
Anatomy of Apology from Rania El Mugammar. http://www.raniawrites.com/
Rania is an artist, anti-oppression consultant, and liberation educator. Her transformative justice workshop invites you to think of punishment, and the way it has and does exist in your life. I’ve taken a few of her workshops, either with companies I’ve been part of, or signed up as an individual. I’ve learned so much from her.
Accountable Communities Consortium https://accountablecommunities.com/
Supports individuals and organisations through education and collaboration. Founding Member: Shannon Perez-Darby
afikra https://www.afikra.com/
afikra is an incredible organisation that celebrates Arab curiosity, culture, and storytelling. They have live events in many cities around the globe, with topics ranging from “The History of Eyeliner” to “The Importance of Za’atar” (I went to that one, and it satisfied my nerdiness and tastebuds).
A Comedians Take on How to Save Democracy, Jordan Klepper Ted Talk
Deaf Artists & Theatre Toolkit
Be sure to read the “Cultural Context” section before diving into the practical offerings!
“Everyday Resources for a Punishment-Free World” https://abolitionist.tools/
Resources include: Self-Accountability and Movement Building (referenced here), Fumbling Towards Repair, and many other helpful slide decks/topics.
first person by Ed Roberson
A poem
“Governance Structures for Theatres, by Theatres” Yvette Nolan
“One-size-fits-all does not fit anyone, and has created a culture that allows dysfunction to hide behind a structure that gives the appearance of legitimacy, the illusion of oversight.”
Nicole Daniel, Instagram @NicoleOlive
Nicole is a comedian with a character called “Nonprofit Boss”. Satire has the beauty of shining light on flaws. She’s also just stupid funny.
Rabbi Sharon Brous on Lovett or Leave It
Interview Only: Young Men Find Community in The Dark Corners of The Internet... They Should Go to the Synagogue
Full Podcast Episode: Tower to the People | Crooked Media
In her interview with Jon Lovett on the podcast Lovett or Leave It, Rabbi Sharon Brous talks about an incident where, as she was calling for an end to the illegal settlements in the West Bank, she was confronted by an aggressive leader of the settler movement. She sat down for lunch with him, agreed on absolutely nothing, and left extremely troubled. Years later, she learned he had a change of heart based on their interaction. Jon asks her if the experience was worth it even without the happy ending. Rabbi Brous says that even if he didn’t change his mind, she - for her own sake - needed to see his humanity. Seeing someone for their humanity isn’t a panacea, but it is a vital step in creating policies that make lasting social impact and change.
I like to remind myself of that story when I get on my petty train. I can’t control what people think or do, but I can control my own capacity for compassion and humanity when doing so.
The State of Black Women Leadership Is In Danger by Cyndi Suarez, November, 2023, NPQ.
White Supremacy Culture in Organizations from the Centre for Community Organizations (COCO) COCO offers workshops, online resources, and consultations for community organizations hoping to create more equitable work environments.
White Supremacy Culture
This resource is often cited in multi-racial spaces and created by white racial justice advocate Dr. Tema Okun.
Skin, Tooth, and Bone: The Basis of Movement is Our People from Sins Invalid.
This is a great disability justice primer, and there is a huge overlap between philosophies discussed, and the solidarity economy.
Conflict is Not Abuse: Overstating Harm, Community Responsibility, and the Duty of Repair
By Sarah Schulman
So I hesitated about including this book as a suggested read, because I know there is a lot of controversy around it and the author. I chose to include it because I believe there is value in it, because I believe all books have value. However, I do not agree with everything offered (which is totally okay, especially when it comes to socio-economic topics), but engaging with it critically is still worthwhile. If you want to avoid it, I’m happy to recommend other sources.
Understanding Capitalism by Richard Wolff
So I don’t think a lot of people recognise how they are psychologically conditioned by capitalism, because they don’t know that capitalism isn’t the only economic system. I think this book is super simple to read, and helps remove the idea that “well I’m not making money, so I’m not perpetuating capitalism harm” that exists in the non-profit/theatre world.
The Serviceberry: Abundance and Reciprocity in the Natural World by Robin Wall Kimmerer
Knowing what capitalism actually is helps us identify worlds outside of it, and how we can build deeper relationships with each other. I read this in just a few days, and loved every page. Pair this book with Richard Wolff’s book.
Capitalism in the 21st Century - Book and Movie
I’ve only watched the movie, because it’s hard to turn pages with buttery popcorn fingers.
Inside Out 2 - Pixar
Make it a movie night!
When Your Month is Lonely… by Christine Kwon
Another poem
Democracy as Creative Practise edited by Tom Borrup & Andrew Zitcer
Great read. Very practical and based on accounts from working artists.
Creative Infrastructures: Artists, Money and Entrepreneurial Action by Linda Essig
This is a fantastic read that unpacks a lot of issues in our theatre world. Linda is a dramaturg, so the way she applies institutional dramaturgy to companies and their mandates, while placing the theatre ecology in a wider lens is really helpful.
Practising Cooperation: Mutual Aid Beyond Capitalism by Andrew Zitcer
I think this is a great book, though I’d pair it with other writers from organizing communities, so as not to get stuck in the theatre-world too much.
The Art of Relevance by Nina Simon
Quick and useful read for theatre leaders. Nina has a lot of ted talks as well.
The Politics of Trauma by Staci K Haines
This is a book I’ve referenced a lot, as I’ve noticed its use in organizing communities and in theatre. Engaging in trauma-informed leadership, which also means unpacking your own trauma so you’re not throwing it at other people.
Identifying Gaslighting: Signs, Examples, and Seeking Help
There are so many instances of gaslighting in the theatre world, and many employers/supervisors believe this is simply a way of communicating and proving their point. Learn what it is, so you don’t not continue this abusive tactic.
What is Gaslighting from Forbes Magazine
Neither of the above sources will fully teach you (highly recommend The Politics of Trauma for a deeper understanding of trauma-informed engagements), but are useful to begin your journey.
Integrating Mindfulness into Anti-Oppression Pedagogy: Social Justice in Higher Education by Beth Berila
Even though this is about higher education circles, I think it is so useful for leaders in creative industries. It taps into dismantling white supremacist defaults and making spaces actually liberated, rather than just plastering a “it’s all cool here!” sign on the door.
Radical Dharma: Talking Race, Love, and Liberation by Rev. angel Kyodo williams, Lama Rod Owens and Jasmine SyedullahThis book took a while to grow on me, but it definitely did. The authors discuss their journeys with embodied activism, and how to ensure our values and principles can exist within our actions, even in times of stress. I read this with Politics of Trauma, and there was something great about the two approaches side by side.
Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good by adrienne maree brown
So you may notice I allude to a lot of resources outside of theatre. The reason is that theatre is quite conservative, and dominated by neoliberal thinking. I’ve learned more about community building and conflict engagement in organizing circles than in theatre. I think looking to those spaces is a very useful way to grow.
What Happened, Miss Simone?
I found this documentary heart-breaking. It offers a look into what happens when we don’t confront our trauma - and I don’t simply mean as individuals, but as a society. Trauma, in a contemporary sense, is not an individual failing, but a product of the systems we live in. Nina Simone was an incredible artist and activist, and seeing her struggle without support is so devastating.
American Revolutionary: Grace Lee Boggs
This documentary is helpful because it takes a look at humility and principled action. It also confronts many of the misunderstood conversations around identity politics that exist today.
“If Black Women Were Free”: An Oral History of the Combahee River Collective from Marian Jones
The Combahee Collective coined the term “identity politics” which has been perverted by the left and right. A closer look at the collective’s actual language shows its not simply about representation, but collective justice. They also discuss engaging with conflict between themselves and those around them.
Prentis Hemphill Prentis talks about embodiment in a lot of ways: books, classes, and I especially love their podcast.
The Oxford Handbook of Arts and Cultural Management
Okay, so this is a stupidly expensive book, so request it through the library (even a chapter or two). I think the :Shared Leadership and the Evolution of Festivals: What Can Be Learned?” and the “The Death of white Supremacy Culture in the US Creative Sector and Implications for Arts Management: A Critical Race Theory View” are really useful for the topic of accountability.
Some academic papers I found useful:
Amy Whitaker’s "The Rise of Hybrid Practice: Creative Institutional Design as Arts Entrepreneurship."
Paloma Ragoo’s "A Social Construction of Accountability." In Reframing Nonprofit Management: Democracy, Inclusion, and Social Change,
Richard W. Scott’s . “The Adolescence of Institutional Theory.” In Theories of Organization
McMullen, J. S., K. M. Brownell, and J. Adams. “What Makes an Entrepreneurship Study Entrepreneurial? Toward a Unified Theory of Entrepreneurial Agency.” Entrepreneurship Theory and Practice
